Why do we stress over stressing?

A lot of us are busier than we’ve ever been, and I’ll be open with you–I got a bit on my plate these days as well.  My library, like many others lately, is going through its ups and downs, I’m still trying to put my house in order after moving into it with my fiance about two months ago, and I have not one but two wedding ceremonies to think about (that’s what happens sometimes when you’re a bi-coastal couple).

This morning, yet another detail concerning Wedding #1 needed to be addressed, which sent my stress levels up instantly.  I started worrying about that detail, and that led to me to worry about other details, and then I started to worry that I was worrying too much about different things, like feeling guilty that I was worrying, especially because my future mother-in-law is helping to organize Wedding #1 in Idaho and my aunt is doing the same with Wedding #2 in Pennsylvania.  In all this, my fiance is the unfortunate one with the front row seat to my fretting, and he calmly observed today that I’m stressed over stressing.  Somehow, I get the feeling I’m not alone in doing this.

It’s one thing to be stressed over something, but to be stressed over stressing?  Well, as I found out through a little research, stress actually does beget stress.  For example, if you worry over one thing, that worry may make you anxious, which in turn will affect other things going on in your life.  It’s a chain reaction.  Today I’m stressed over what party trays to get for Wedding #1, and that makes me stressed about going tux shopping tomorrow for Wedding #2 and whether it will go smoothly or not.

I know there are different things we can do to relieve our stress.  Meditate, sleep, breathe, get a massage, or do whatever else we enjoy doing.  However, doing those things are easier said than done.  A while back I wrote about how more women than men tend to be multi-thinkers.  Today I’m publicly admitting that it’s not always good to be multi-thinking and I wish I could sometimes (okay, often) be like my fiance who has a knack of putting things that don’t need his attention or worry out of his mind and focus on what’s right in front of him.  The question of questions, though, is why is it so much easier to stress than it is to relax?

Why, indeed.